Saturday, September 14, 2013


Finding motivation is the hardest part of trying to get fit.
I spent the last three years not caring what I looked like. I got fat, my hair always looks like crap, and I rarely wear make up anymore. Occasionally I will go back and look at pictures from high school, and that's when I realize what I've done to myself. I use to look so good! My teeth where whiter than snow, and my hair was so long and beautiful! I didn't have the acne that I have now, and I was all around thinner! It makes me sad seeing what I threw away, so I'm in need of motivation to get me into some healthier habits.

I read somewhere that it's a good idea to find a picture of what you want to look like and refer back to it, that way you've always got a clear image of what you're shooting for. Most people's idea of sexy is like, skinny, big boobs, a nice butt, long hair, blah blah blah. 

Well, that ain't me. And to be honest, I will probably NEVER look like that. Which I'm cool with because I don't wanna be that thin really. I just want to wear a smaller pair of jeans than I wore in high school. And look good in them. Truthfully, if I had to look like a model I would rather look like Tara Lynn or someone curvy like that. 

Nothing against skinny people, but I think curves are more attractive. And no, I don't just say that because I'm fat and I'm bitter about it. Yeah, I am fat, and I most certainly am bitter about it, but even if I was a size two, I would think bigger women are more attractive. Same goes for men. 

I can't say I would complain about nailing a guy that looks like this, but typically men like that don't go for chicks like me, hah. Which I'm actually perfectly fine with because I'm usually into guys that are bigger anyway. I don't know why, I there's just something about a chubby guy that I like lol

But let's face it, most of the chubby guys like the skinny ladies too. Anyway, back to me! I've found that looking at pictures of women who are smaller than me don't really help. Because I will never look like them. Even if I was completely fit and thin, I would look different. So the best way to keep myself motivated is to look at pictures of myself. I start with something recent.


See, that's gross. But I've stared at myself for so long that I got use to it. After I see my fat self, I look back at skinnier me. 

This picture is a little more suggestive than anything I take these days. I was 16 and sending the picture to my boyfriend at the time. Even then, I wasn't skinny. But I was 70 pounds lighter than I am now. 
Moving on...

I can still bend like that, but it doesn't look as good anymore!

Look at that! I didn't even realize how pointy my face use to be! Now, my head is just a big blob with a mouth. 
So after seeing how pretty I use to be, I go back and look at another fat picture. While this one is hilarious, I look disgusting. 

I am making a promise to myself that by this time next year I will look just as good, if not better than I did in high school. I will NEVER in life be as big as I am today. I keep myself motivated by looking at what I know I can be. I can't imagine myself skinny like Kate Moss, but I can imagine high school Kenna. I know that being that thin is possible because I've already done it!

I'd say it's working well, I'm down 5 pounds since I first started blogging about my weight. Yay me!

Also, another good way to stay motivated is by looking at the success of other ladies I went to school with. They're not inspiration necessarily but I am HIGHLY competitive, and when I see their success it makes me want to do better than them. So a big thank you to all the ladies that lost weight after high school; I probably wouldn't be able to keep myself on this journey if it weren't for you all setting the bar so high!

Five down, sixty-five to go. Look out, here comes sexy!

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